Bullying-What is the School's Responsibility

In my role as a teacher I viewed the school's and my responsibility concerning bullying as being an extremely serious one.

When parents send their children to school, it is the school's reponsibility to provide the children with the best possible education and to keep the children SAFE--emotionally and physically. Emotional safety is probably the most important safety because a child who doesn't feel emotionally safe can not learn to the best of his/her responsibility.

I know FIRST hand that the most carefully planned and executed lessons in character education is required first and foremost. Children need to be taught exactly what constitutes bullying. They need to understand that there is often a great difference between girl bullying and boy bullying.

According to Pathways Courses (http://pathwayscourses.samhsa.gov/bully/bully_2_pg14.htm)
girls tend to exhibit the following:

Manipulating one's relationships with peers;
Purposefully ignoring someone when angry (giving the "silent treatment");
Spreading hurtful rumors or talking about someone; and
Telling others not to play with or talk to a certain classmate as a means of retaliation

Boys, according to this same site, tend to be more agressive and exhibit more physically agressive behaviors with their bullying behaviors.

Children need to be taught through more traditional methods but most importantly with role playing and discussion.

Instruction needs to be ONGOING. 3-4 lessons dropped then not mentioned regularly do not adequately prepare students to identify bullying behaviors in themselves, toward themselves or toward others.

In addition, students need numerous opportunities to PRACTICE skills. Like tornado, earthquake and fire drills are practiced regularly to help ensure that students know exactly how to react and when, frequent discussion, demonstrations and role playing helps students know how to more automatically react to bullying issues in a healthy manner.

One of the greatest skills to teach students, after identification, is to seek the help of a GROUP of students. They need to be able to identify students, who when called upon in a situation where an adult is not present, will come to the aid of the child who is being bullied. (much like a block watch)
Certainly, children should not be expected to step into physically violent situations, rather, they should know to have some stay to urge the bully to stop and others to seek help immediately.

Standing up for oneself or another is among the most difficult of all bullying skills. Students are afraid for themselves that their taking a stand will serve to invite bullying unto them. Usually, that fear is correct because schools, teachers and staff often lack a cohesive plan to deal absolutely with student bullying.

Teachers, administrators, staff all need to be able to identify signs of bullying and have a specific plan to deal with the problem that includes training and counseling for the bullies and the bullied. Punishment without education has always seemed to me to make matters worse between the parties because bullies blame their victims for "getting me into trouble".

Students need to be taught exactly the same things. They need to identify behaviors. They need to know exactly what school expectations and consequences are in place and, most importantly, they need a plan for reaction. We adults need to teach them-they are not born with the knowledge.

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me." FALSE
Names often are far more damaging than any stick or stone. At a time when students are forming their views of who they are, peer impressions are often the most indellible opinions etched in their minds. The effects of bullying can emotionally cripple a child for life or cause someone to TAKE his/her life. We owe it to the bullies to not burden them with the responsibility of the lifetime consequences for their actions and we owe it to the victims to not allow them to be crippled or driven to take their lives. The only way we can fulfill our responsibility to the children in our care is through our own awareness and education and passing our knowledge to the children with whose safety we are entrusted by their families.

to be continued

*OneHappyTree-these articles are primarily for you and are a response to your post.

some resources:

http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/mortarboard/2006/03/are_girls_worse_bullies_than_b.html
http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/mortarboard/2006/03/are_girls_worse_bullies_than_b.html
http://stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/adult/indexAdult.asp?Area=prothrow
http://www.teachersandfamilies.com/open/parent/ra1.cfm